To follow up on the I Love You from Ella……I need to give an update on our progress.
There is no quick way to sum up what the last four months have included. But if you are truly curious, go HERE and look at the list of attachment activities. We have attempted most of the things on the list, at least in one form or another. And somehow it works. And when I say “I” I really mean me. Not Chris or anyone else. Just me. But yes, it works.
I have to prove to her that I am here to stay. That I will not fail her like all the women in her life have previously. And to earn her trust, to help her build healthy relationships, to show her that I AM here for her. For whatever she needs ….significant needs or insignificant wants. I will do everything in my power to help her. But I am still a weary mom of three preschoolers and some days I am not the best version of my self. Thank goodness she doesn’t hold that against me.
But something must be working because we are seeing some progress. Fewer tears, breakdowns, tantrums.
You can see that Ella is settled a bit more. More comfortable. More joyful. More expressive. Even her speech started improving once we started implementing these changes.
We still have a long ways to go. And I imagine we will always be parenting a bit differently (not better or worse….just differently). But it so worth it to have a daughter that feels safe, and secure, and confident at her place in this family.
A big thanks to my Mom who takes Wyatt twice a week, while Will is in school, so that Ella and I can have quality time together. That along with the time we get together Sunday mornings while everyone else is at church has helped tremendously. It does take a village!